SHILLONG: India’s sexual revolution is irreversible, but there is still a danger of a backlash from conservative members of society, with the new BJP-led government at the centre a particular worry.
That was one of the main points at a panel discussion, entitled The Love Sutra, at the CALM Festival here on Friday.
The discussion was preceded by the launch of Ira Trivedi’s new book, India in Love, which takes a look at the ongoing change in attitudes in India to marriage and sexuality.
Also in the panel were writer and columnist Shobhaa De, The Shillong Times editor Patricia Mukhim, MLCU vice-chancellor RG Lyngdoh and Sri Lankan author Ashok Ferry. The discussion was moderated by journalist Madhu Jain.
Trivedi stated that she started her research into her new book in Shillong, her first stop on a tour of 15 cities around the country that saw her interview over 500 people.
“Shillong is really special because people were so open about sharing their experiences, which was not always the case in other countries,” Trivedi said.
She added that from all the cities, Shillong men are the nicest because she felt safe walking in the streets no matter what time of the day or night.
De expressed concern over how expressions of love and sexuality might be restricted in the future.
“MF Hussain had to live and die in exile and young people continue to be hounded, even in big cities like Bangalore, where couples holding hands in public and women have a drink in a bar are harassed,” De said. “Are we going back to 19th century puritanical mindset?”
De and Jain were also interested in knowing more about the situation in Meghalaya and Mukhim explained that the more accepting attitude taken to live-in relationships among the Khasis has regressed with the advent of Christianity.
“I come from a society that accepted co-habitation, but judgement of such relationships arrived with Christianity,” she said.
“This faith has changed our worldview and many of our young are confused because of it,” which has led to high rates of alcoholism and frustration, and she urged a reconsideration of indigenous values to combat this. She also went into the tradition of youngest daughters being custodians of family property and the changes that this system has seen with outside pressures playing their part. Ferry then pointed out that Meghalaya and Sri Lanka share this custom, but his country is also seeing a change in this tradition.
Back on the subject of the sexual revolution, Trivedi said she was ultimately positive about the direction in which the country is going.
“There is a backlash from khap panchayats, police, families and maybe the new government, but the revolution is so strong that there’s no going back.”
