By Tirot Sing Suchiang
I personally believe that a person’s morality is shaped by the good and evil influences to which he or she is exposed. A child’s most important influences comes from parents. I remember a portion from the Scriptures (Math 7:16,17) which says, “ You will know them by their fruits.” Good trees bear good fruit and vice versa. You will know the parents from their children, family from their off-springs because children are the reflection of the family/home. Parents must involve themselves in their children’s lives enough to ensure that no other influences take precedence. We cannot blame others for our kid’s failures. Today more than the parents it is the world that influences our kids. Parents no longer determine what kind of people their kids will grow up to be. We have invested less time in teaching our kids while allowing them to watch unlimited and unregulated television viewing time. We have allowed spiritual, moral and ethical instruction to come from the television, internet, movies, music etc. Though I don’t say having a television at home is a sin, but the content of most programmes are designed to negate our spirit.
Many years ago we bought a television set with a strong determination and understanding to have control over it. Things went as planned for a while but soon things began to change. Everyone in the family was drawn to it. Television became the main attraction to everyone in our home. I believe there are parents and children who are more interested in the world of television than family values. Television viewing can keep us away from other meaningful activities and pursuits . It is amazing at how early infants imitate us. Shortly after birth an infant smiles back at us. They do not have the ability to screen out the good from the bad. Children who are 3- 4 years old are still unable to distinguish reality from fantasy. When it comes to television children believe what they see. They believe they are viewing a realistic representation of the world around them. These are made to appear as factual sources of information about the world outside their home. Children believe what they see, despite what you may tell them. When they grow up and face moral choices, such images re-surface and shape their behaviour. That is fearful considering the fast paced and low moral values of most programmes. How many of us parents un-consciously feed our children a diet of crime. sex, violence on television. We give them total access to the internet and videos and then wonder why our children lose respect for God, parents, religion, life, property etc . We allow them to watch naked pictures of adults on television and internet and then wonder why they are so casual about sex and marriage. That is why of late we witness so many sexual crimes (rape ,molestation etc). Sexual immorality is one of the sins that invited God’s judgment.
If the children become something other than what the parents hoped for it is usually because they have simply learned from those who were there to teach them. Parenting is a full time responsibility; there are no tea breaks from our parental duties; not an hour in a day is to be excluded; no time out if you want to be faithful parents. Some of us compartmentalize our children’s life and assign a set number of hours per week to spend on parenting and then fulfill our duties as parents. We call it “quality time,” but this whole philosophy is wrong. What about the remaining hours of their lives? Who will have more influence in shaping the child’s character? We have to admit that as parents we have failed miserably in our responsibility. Whenever we parents neglect our children they suffer a spiritual and moral famine. Look at this generation now! It is as bleak as it has ever been. Why are we surrendering our most precious children to influences that are overtly violent and morally corrupt? We should make a decision to be committed to teaching our children what they need to learn. We cannot rely too much on Sunday School teachers , youth leaders , school teachers , religious leaders, counselors etc., because they are all outside the purview of the family.
It is time we take a stand and guard the moral climate of our homes and families. Let us spend more time with our children and loved ones instead of spending time in front of the television, internet, movies etc that devours our precious resources. Instead of feeding ourselves and our children with soul defiling pictures, songs, movies etc., let us promote reading of good books, listening to uplifting music and playing and going out together as a family. Doing things together helps us relate to each other. In this way our minds will be more creative and we will enjoy life in ways we have never experienced. An old Chinese proverb says, “One generation plants the trees and the other gets the shade.” Our generation lives in the shade of many trees that were planted by our ancestors. We derive our shade from our parents and grandparents. Their ideals determine the kind of civilization we inherited from them. Likewise our generation’s ideals will shape tomorrow’s culture of our kids but the big question is, “ARE WE PLANTING THE RIGHT KIND OF TREES FOR SHADE or ARE WE LEAVING OUR CHILDREN TOTALLY EXPOSED?