By Jenniefer Dkhar
The theme for this year’s International Women’s Day, “Accelerate Action” points to the fact that we need to speed up and move fast as something is not moving right and quick enough. What the two words hint at are the inadequacies and discrepancies that are in existence in societies across the world. Well, it had and still has never been easy for women to carve a space for themselves or to even have a voice and be heard. Assigned roles framed by society have a definite and clear-cut demarcation of the positions and responsibilities of men and women. This then makes it difficult for women to be somebody they are not expected to be. So, to conform is to belong and to fit in. In fact, what is common is that both men and women have grown up with these male prescribed roles that appear as golden rules that must be challenged to the minimum. It is also true that things are beginning to change for the better for women but a lot of work is still left to be done. Perhaps the need to accelerate action is timely. To deliberate and discuss is much needed but to put words into action is the real test.
Our state, though matrilineal in nature yet women have fewer decision-making responsibilities and are often pushed to the periphery. To start with, the presence of women in the local “dorbar shnong” is still prohibited as customary law says that a woman must not be allowed to participate in decision making since that is the right and prerogative of the men. What is interesting is the decision-making process. Yes, in the urban sector with most families becoming more nuclear in nature, the mother and father discuss and take decisions unanimously. But this may not be the case in the rural areas or for that matter even in the conventional families that are upholding traditions and customary laws stringently. At some point the roles of women have not changed, no matter how progressive one may be. We see a working woman, even if she is placed in a high paying job still responsible for household chores as a nurturer, a giver and a care-taker. Her responsibility does not end with being an equal contributor to the financial growth and stability of the family alongside her male counterpart. From conversations with women who are well placed in their jobs, one learns that almost every one of them agree that the roles and responsibilities of the daughter, wife and mother will always be one that a working woman will still adhere to and abide by. It is unlikely that such women will step aside and simply allow someone else to fulfil their share of duties and responsibilities. If one may try to conjecture, perhaps the reason behind this is in the way a woman is raised and nurtured since her childhood. These seeds of the nurturer in her do not allow her to look the other way. Therefore, we have working women working very hard at their workplace and also giving their heart and soul in fulfilling the needs of their family at home. Women have been balancing the two roles beautifully.
One must also not sideline another truth especially prevalent in the cities that a strong support system of the family members especially the husband is also noticed. Sharing of responsibilities at home is much needed and, in most cases, provided. Thus, many women, especially wives and mothers who have carved a niche for themselves in the annals of history must have these strong hands to support them.
Keeping the spirit of the week, the focus today is to cheer and celebrate those women who have withstood the test of time and are braving numerous challenges daily. These women have walked hand in hand with their male counterparts in almost every sphere in life. To celebrate few of these women achievers, some that come to mind are Sunita Williams, J. K. Rowling, Sudha Murthy, Nargis Mohammadi, Mary Kom Patricia Mukhim and many more. These women are living examples of the need for the society to realise the potential of women if they are given opportunities and a support system. Reaching paths that could be a distant dream for both men and women the stories of these women are inspiring and reassuring. Theirs are lives that tell the world that all that women need are opportunities. It is women like these who are representatives of womenfolk in the world as they are in a position to speak for the cause of other less fortunate women.
It is the less fortunate women and their unspoken stories that must not be left untold and unheard. They may not create records to be remembered in history but theirs are lives that are filled with challenges and tests every single day. Single mothers in particular are bereft of the support of the partner and are made to make ends meet as well as provide that emotional and mental strength for their children. There are daily wage labourers who rely on the earnings they receive at the end of the day. Gender disparity, unequal pay, limited career growth, harassment at the workplace, domestic violence, sexual assault, rape and murder and many more are daily realities.
We’re in the 21st century, and yet there is a lot that must be done. To start with, the world must be a safe place for women to live in. Crimes and violence against women must be stringently dealt with by the legal system. Women must be provided equal opportunities as men in any field, women must be included in decision making whether at home or in the society and community, etc. The bottom line is that it is important for both men and women to come together and work hand in hand to make this world a safe and happy place to be in. This Women’s Day let us all come together and realise the strength of being one!