By Joseph M. Kharkongor
We live in a highly hypocritical and judgmental world. Hypocrisy happens when people say one thing but do another. It often leads to frustration because it involves double standards. A wealthy person often tells others that money doesn’t bring happiness. Yet, they work tirelessly to earn more, prioritize wealth over relationships, and judge others based on income.
People present themselves as highly moral and upright. They criticize others for dishonesty, greed, or selfishness. However, behind closed doors, they engage in shady business deals, lie when it benefits them and only act kind when people are watching. A public figure builds their reputation on supporting strong family values but is later caught having multiple affairs. A preacher or religious leader speaks about morality, telling others to avoid sinful behaviour. Yet, they secretly engage in the very actions they condemn. A child counsellor advising children not to watch porn yet spends the entire night downloading sex videos.
Speaking of “sex videos”, none (in my opinion) has been judged more in society than the “sex worker.” Yes, the sex worker!
Rot, ‘thei awria, ‘thei nuti, ‘thei die met, ‘thei sbun, ‘thei bun lok… Yes, they go by different names; and what they do may be the world’s oldest profession; but no, it is certainly not the most revered. For many, this hidden community is shrouded in a web of fascination and disgust. There are vast misconceptions surrounding prostitution; and women doing sex work here in Meghalaya face great prejudice.
But why do people here hate sex workers so much? What do these “rot” actually do? Why do they do it? And how is it anyone else’s business what these women choose to do in their lives? Intrigued by the topic, this author has done some intense digging and even collaborated with a computer hacker to unravel spicy details about the sex industry here and the people in it. And what we found is simply shocking.
The hacker after successfully penetrating into the phone and OneDrive account of a West Khasi Hills-based sex worker, gained access to over 4GB of personal files including nude photos and sex videos of over a thousand customers… 272 of whom hail from the Khasi-Jaiñtia Hills of Meghalaya and also include doctors, lawyers, engineers, policemen and a judicial magistrate. Prior to this, in 2020 and 2023, two pastors of the Khasi Jaiñtia Presbyterian church were also exposed for cheating on their wives with two other sex workers, exchanging obscene photos and videos of themselves via social media platforms. Details of this hack has been published on MegLeaks (https://megleaks.wordpress.com)
While reviewing this finding, I couldn’t help but question myself: Isn’t it funny how respectable people here in our “Ri Tip-Briew Tip-Blei” would publicly judge and humiliate sex workers, yet secretly seek their services? Seriously I wouldn’t have uttered this if I didn’t have evidence. But trust me… the evidence is overwhelming. This topic has drawn attention for several years here, but our hypocritical and judgmental society has repeatedly failed to understand the root cause of this “problem” degrading this group of people without understanding where they come from.
Sex workers here are diverse and come from different backgrounds and histories. The hate they endure is due to perpetuated and unsubstantiated myth about who they are and what they do. These reasons are mostly based in misogyny and toxic philosophies of discrimination. Most people would question why they even exist. Well, that’s mainly because society and economies fail to provide material support for many people. While waiting for justice and human rights advancements, people die. So they work doing what is available or what is best for them, so they don’t die. Ask yourself: Why would people deliberately choose to be in danger from the hatred that is focused on them? Why do people continue to do sex work generation after generation no matter what hate increases happen?
True, sex work is a degrading job, leaving women very vulnerable; and there are several reasons why these women even enter the illegal trade, but it is far from being an easy way to earn money. Confessions reveal that women mainly become involved as a last resort. Some are coerced into it through a forceful or violent partner. For others, addiction to drugs forces them to earn money in any way they can. Women who find themselves in a social circle where their friends or family members are already involved may become sex workers, deceived by the notion that it will be an easy way to make a living. Gender issues also play a part, where they are frequently economically oppressed. But once they start working in the sex industry, it is difficult for them to stop.
It is also important to note that many are forced into sex work through issues beyond their control, to lead difficult and dangerous lives. They are plagued by stereotypes and degraded by the attitude of the general public. The health and social needs of women working in prostitution may be complex.
But whatever the case, it is about time we stop judging and start caring for this group of people, keeping in mind their most basic human rights. Doctors and healthcare professionals too have an important role to play in caring for their health needs. They need to understand the issues sex workers face and prejudices they encounter. By doing this they will be better equipped to empathize with women and cater more effectively for their individual needs. By understanding the issues these women face, help should be provided in a non-judgmental and empathetic way, allowing these women to make informed choices. Emotional support should be offered and practical advice with regard to housing, children and health should also be given. It’s high time people stopped judging and started helping.
(The author is a private teacher, skill trainer and blogger. He resides at Mawlai Nongkwar, Shillong – 8. Joseph M. Kharkongor writes for MegLeaks (https://megleaks.wordpress.com) but is not involved in any of the hacking or uncovering of information. He plays the part of a middleman, passing on data received anonymously via email to the press. For any questions or concern regarding material featured/mentioned in this article or any of the previous articles or letters by this author, feel free to email the hacker directly at [email protected])
