Thursday, December 12, 2024
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Minus And Plus

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By Ananya S Guha

For once he was in office my very dear friend whose latest slogan is “Corruption Hatao” following of course the coterie that has now been established in our country thanks to the intimidation of a few who claim to be ‘conscience keepers’. Not finding him in Laitumkhrah which is his favourite jaunt, either sipping tea quietly in an obscure corner of a restaurant or sidled by the side of a Paan Shop, I decided to make a foray into his office. There he was, head buried deep in a sheaf of papers, and files lying carelessly on one side of a table.

“Lot of work?” I enquired politely. He made a gesture asking me to sit which I did quietly. Silence and the ticking of the clock. I was waiting for one of his tirades, or a lecture on the ills prevailing in the world around him. Finally he broke the stifling silence with a smile and then went on to explain how the cruel hands of office work were impeding his visits to his favourite haunts, whether it be Laitumkhrah or Police Bazar.

“And now these TA bills!” he exclaimed.

“What happened to them?” I asked politely.

“You see” he went on “I have two minus bill and three plus bills which makes it, if my arithmetic is correct; one plus bill” he said triumphantly “Thank God” he continued, “minus bills could be a reflection on your integrity”.

“What are minus bills and plus bills?” I asked innocently.

“Don’t talk about them loudly” he whispered and looked around nervously. “You see I’m thinking of how to convert the minus into plus” “But is that ethical?” I asked. “Don’t talk about ethics” he snapped back.

“You know” he said, conspiratorially lowering his voice once again into hushed tones. “Once they become plus bills, then, hey presto they become your savings can you imagine that?” he chortled gleefully; “minus becomes plus and then they are your savings. Can you beat that?”

I could not, so I beat it!

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