Child safety in wired world

By BK Mishra

In this digital world, it is important for every parent to take basic measures to ensure the safety of his or her ward. Many of the parents get little or no time to check on their children, especially teenagers. Despite the busy schedule, it becomes imperative for them to make some efforts keeping in mind the growing cases of cyber crime. Keep a watch on your children and follow the simple steps.

1. Make sure your child does not spend all of his/her time on the computer. Use RAZZUL software at home and it is great for children. But because all the games can be accessed online we can also activate the time limit feature in the software to only allow a certain amount of time online on weekends and weekdays. Many parents use the Internet as a babysitter, much like the television set. When we have things to do it is nice to have our children occupied but let’s make sure they are not spending all of their time glued to the computer screen.

2. Keep the computer in an area where it can be monitored, like the family room, kitchen or living room, not in your child’s bedroom. Many homes have the computer in the basement but I have to ask — is that a place where parents frequent? Usually not, and it is not a great place to have the computer hooked to the internet either. We have to monitor the activities of our children to make sure they are staying safe.

3. Learn enough about computers so you can enjoy them together with your kids. You have read this book so now you are learning! Again, I suggest that you sit down with your children and let them teach you more. You will be surprised at how eager they will be to show you their abilities. We all like to brag and children are no different. If you have to search for something for work or find an interest or hobby on the internet, ask your kids to help. Spend some quality time with them, and let them teach you.

4. Teach them never to meet an online friend offline unless you are with them. Although this sounds like common sense, many children have met with people in person that they met online as a stranger. I explained how easy it is to build rapport with children but unfortunately children don’t really understand this concept. Children are very trusting and don’t think there are people in this world who will harm them. It is up to you to let them know they do exist. There are too many children who have gone missing because of such meetings. Remember, children should never meet someone in person they have met online unless accompanied by a parent, not another older friend.

5. Watch your children when they’re online and see where they go. Now that your computer is out in the open (Rule Number 2) keep an eye on what sites they like to visit or what chat programs they like to use. Knowing what your children are doing online will help you determine how much time they should be spending online as well as it will give you an idea of why they use the internet. You may see them going to sites that are not really appropriate for them and when you see this you can now tell them why it is inappropriate. You can also see how many people are on their chat list, or what chat rooms they are going into and what the topic of that room is. Remember, POS means “Parents over shoulder!”

6. Make sure that your children feel comfortable coming to you with questions and don’t overreact if things go wrong. Communication is the key and your children have to know that they can come to you with any problems and not get the third degree.

7. Keep children out of chatrooms or IRC (Internet Relay Chat) channels unless they are monitored. This sounds like a definite rule and to a certain extent it is. I am not a big fan of chatrooms because of all the nonsense that occurs within them. I have entered teen chatrooms during investigations to find that children can use foul language and they use these arenas to spout off (flame) and bully others. I don’t feel these are healthy places for children to hang out but if your child feels they just have to be in them, then they should be monitored at all times. Links to inappropriate sites are posted in these rooms and in the IRC channels, files are traded to occupants that are not only inappropriate but illegal as well. There are certain websites which have monitored chatrooms for children but again these should be approved by the parents. Instant messaging with friends is common for most youth but the need for chatrooms where many unknown individuals hang out is not a necessity.

8. Encourage discussions between you and your child about what they enjoy online. Again keeping that line of communication open with your children about their likes and dislikes on the net enhances online activity for the child and gives you some peace of mind as a parent.

9. Teach them what information they can share with others online and what they can’t (like telephone numbers, address, their full name and school). No information about your child should be given out over the internet. I know that as children get older they will want to do things like having a blog site where they can do a daily journal but for the very young, absolutely no information should be given out whatsoever. Giving out this information is just giving ammunition to predators. Just a name could be enough to gather information about your child, not to mention what school they go to, phone number and address. Let your children know that this is one rule that must be abided by no matter what.

10. Get to know their “online friends” just as you get to know all of their other friends. Just as we like to know who our children are hanging out with at school, we should know who they are chatting with online. Have your child explain who these friends are, where they met them and why they like talking with them. Signs that they may be speaking to people they should not would be a sudden shutdown of the computer when you walk by or switching screens on the computer. You might also note if your children are getting phone calls from people you don’t know or they are getting gifts from people you do not know. This is a very common occurrence with predators on the internet.

11. Warn them that people may not be what they seem to be and that people they chat with are not friends, they are just people they chat with. Though the majority of children on the net have pretended to be someone else, someone older or even a different sex, they seem to think everyone else tells the truth online. As a parent you have to drill into them that a lot of people pretend and are not who they say they are online, even if they know the lingo, or have sent a picture of themselves.

12. Discuss these rules, get your children to agree to adhere to them and post them near the computer as a reminder. One thing I have learned is that posting things around my office helps me not only remember but to adhere to them. When I see affirmations everyday, it keeps me on track and the same goes for rules. If they are discussed and posted, chances are that your children will abide by them.

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