By Robert Clements
Those Who Didn’t Believe In Us..!
There were smiles on her face and tears of joy as Coco Gauff won the US Open. She was given the mike as is the custom, and without a moment’s hesitation thanked God for giving her strength to do her best and beat the mighty opponent who she’d won against.
In a few moments she was given a cheque for 3 million dollars but not before she also thanked all the people who did not believe in her!
Strange statement coming from a face without any hate, anger or rancour, because such is normally based on struggle, suppression and colour oppression.
But in her thanking the very same, Coco was saying that those very challenges of suppression gave her muscle to beat world champ, Aryna Sabalenka.
And the crowd applauded seeing her cheerful, smiling, God-thanking face!
It’s the face I’m going to concentrate on right now, because all around me as our country takes baby steps and quickly bigger steps into the world arena, we have leaders with faces full of anger and hate. They, also talk of those who tried to stop them, those who stood in our path as a country, those who threw insults at us for many centuries, but instead of acknowledging that this is how we developed muscle, these same leaders like generals leading a march past in a dictator’s country, try to show faces hard, ruthless and unmerciful to the cameraman!
It’s time to smile!
Obama was the first African American president, and could have shown the world a stern, angry face full of resentment for past hurts to his people and maybe himself, but instead showed one of gentleness and compassion.
It is time we learnt to do just that.
When we don’t and show unblinking eyes with no trace of a smile, we don’t show strength but the baggage of the past we carry, which is a huge sign of weakness.
The most successful generals had the kindest faces but were ruthless in battle. They didn’t waste their energy, keeping their bow permanently taut, but bent the bow only when the arrow needed to fly, and strike.
The smile seems to have disappeared from some of the faces of those who rule, and seemingly the feeling trying to be conveyed is, “See how tough we are! Beware!”
Well, it was a smiling face that won the US Open, and one, which had faced hurts and taunts of those who stood in her way but used them as fuel for victory!
Yes, dear friends, victory doesn’t come with those stern looks of hate you carry, nor the baggage that pulls you down, but comes in thanking historical insults and events for the unintentional push they gave.
But I’d like to go further on this same subject. To be able to use insults as fuel, we need to also learn how to handle them, when they are thrown at us:
In ancient Greece and Rome, the Stoics, a group of philosophers who preached the value of emotional resilience — and whose teachings have plenty of modern-day devotees — urged adherents to let insults go. “Many have taken small injuries much more seriously to heart than they need,” wrote the Stoic philosopher Seneca. “The best revenge,” advised fellow Stoic and Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, “is to be unlike him who performed the injury.”
And quite often, I’ve found, what we thought is an insult, wasn’t one:
One day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops – a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.
At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, “Big John doesn’t pay!” and sat down at the back.
Did I mention that the driver was just five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn’t argue with Big John, but he wasn’t happy about it.
The next day the same thing happened – Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the one after that, and so forth. This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could no longer stand it. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what’s more, he felt ready to take on Big John.
So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, “Big John doesn’t pay!,” the driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, “And why not?”
With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, “Big John has a bus pass.”
How like the driver we are.
We think every statement is an insult. We look at ourselves and instead of seeing in ourselves a good person, we feel ourselves to be a mere five feet three and everybody around six feet tall and taking advantage.
We scowl at our neighbor. Yell at colleagues and think the world laughs at us.
We grit our teeth, learn karate, buy a bigger car, larger house, and still wonder why they laugh.
“What’s so funny?” we finally ask.
“Nothing,” they say puzzled.
“Then why are you laughing at me?”
“But we’re not laughing at you, we’re smiling at a good clean happy day!”
Moral of this piece:
Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one, especially if it’s an insult you are scowling over!
So next time an insult is thrown at you, handle it well, then grab it, and take it to your mind’s refinery of positive thinking and convert it, like Coco Gauff did into your fuel for success!
Then smile a smile of thanks for the victory you’ll win from the insults of those who didn’t believe in you..!
The Author conducts an Online Writers and Speakers Course. For more details send a thumbs-up to him on WhatsApp 9892572883.
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