By Nathan Marwein
“Where are you going Bahdeng?” I asked a friend of mine who seemed excited and in a hurry. He said, “I got a new job, I’m in the business of collecting money”. Not sure and intrigued by the true nature of his new profession, I congratulated him and tried to get more details about this profession. He enthusiastically told me that I should join it, “It’s very profitable” he said. He elaborated, “Yesterday I told them my mother was sick, the other day I said my daughter was sick; you see, I’m in the business of collecting charity money from candidates contesting the upcoming elections and so far I’ve received Rs.10,000”. This is the startling result of the failure of democracy and justice in the Republic of India. For some people, this election is no more about upholding the pillars of democracy but a mere opportunity to earn easy cash. But how can we blame them for deceiving these candidates, when it’s a fact that these candidates are also in the business of deception.
The election season, is when the circus comes to town. Sources of entertainment appear galore. Scams incriminating politicians spice up the morning papers, schemes never even heard of, suddenly begin to be distributed among the masses by the beaming politicians. Foundation stones are even laid twice over, the eager politicians become the suppliers of domestic wares, just so they could get into the good books of the electorate. The usually invisible MLAs and MDCs who are always in the background during the Assembly Sessions, even pop up into existence and reintroduce themselves to the public. These politicians are the biggest purveyor of change, a rather vague and clichéd term, but change nonetheless. However, when asked about the kinds of policies they are willing to put in place to bring about this change, they are often found to be dumbfounded or would instead give a vague and rhetorical elaboration on the importance of change. They speak of change, but thus far, for most of them, the only change they have brought about, are the changes of a metalled road into a dirt road, particularly, in the far flung areas. Another bemusing trend is to see them mouth diatribes against corruption, but the freebies which they distribute among the electorate to win votes, are never bribes.
Below is a critical analysis of the parties contesting the election this year (2018):
Firstly, what is grand about the “Grand Old Party” in the state is the scale of the scandals it has courted. This grand party in Meghalaya bears resemblance more to a Hindi soap, than the state branch of a national party. Drama is never short with this party. News of infighting, coups, defections, tampering and so on, by members of this party continually greet the readers of morning papers. However, even with little credibility left in them they are quick to point their crooked fingers at others. There’s not much worrying for the leaders of this party, even if most of its leaders and members of their ranks will probably be killed in this war as this Grand Old Party may survive through their well known ingenuity of trading horses after a war.
Secondly, there is this one party which really fits the description of ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’. It is a national party espousing nationalist elements as its core principles, but, to all the states that it has visited, it has used the garb of development to fool the masses. Its leader loves to speak from his heart, so much so, that his heart can no longer feel the plight of the common masses but can only speak. The cries of those dangerous burger eaters victimized by the heroic vigilantes of orange Gotham, have on many occasions, fallen on the deaf ears of this party. It is so blinded by its patriotism for a certain colour that it fails to see the realities and beauty prevalent in a colour such as Indigo. Another trait of this party is its stark contrast to the Grand Old Party. This party usually buys and trades horses before a war rather than after a war and is most willing to give and feed the horses of the Grand Old Party’s enemies.
Thirdly, perhaps the most single minded and visionless parties contesting the upcoming election are these parties. Over the years, they are yet to outgrow their xenophobic agenda. They are so afraid of Martians, Superman, Green Lantern; basically all those not from their world, that they do not even bother to think about anything else, but isolationist agendas like protecting themselves from aliens. The matter of development simply falls by the wayside with these parties.
The fourth party is quite a novelty, but was conceived by old forces. It came to existence because of one man’s lust for two women, this great man, so persuasive and staunch in his beliefs, was able to have his way, and do what most men covet, to keep the wife as well as the mistress. His ability to hold on to both the women despite many suitors fighting for these women’s hand in marriage shot him to fame and glory. The leader of this party of novelty was able to consolidate his position and power even more when it was found out that, a handsome dowry in the form of a special marriage assistance scheme will be gifted to him, as reward for holding on to his wife, despite the coexistence of the mistress, by the central government of a great country. This central government is controlled by wolves in sheep’s clothing, and it was very happy to pay this dowry so that, this great man with two lovers can engage in a beautiful but deadly duel with a dictator whom the wolf in sheep’s clothing has found hard to defeat. This great man with two lovers will surely not use this special marriage assistance scheme for his marriage but for consolidating a relation with the people especially in the months preceding the elections.
Last but not the least; nothing matches the confusing and unpredictable weather pattern of Shillong better than the crux of this party. On the same day, it can be a national party, a regional party, tribal party and non-tribal party; depending on the platform and audience, before which it is campaigning. They put the chameleon to shame with their cloaking capabilities. Now, this is the veritable yes-party who sometimes go by the alias of ‘Super Sub’ or Chicharito (Manchester United’s Super Sub), but for their ingenuity in being somebody else’s substitute. Its eagerness to please everybody is akin to a youngster, smitten with puppy love.
These are the characteristic traits of the Meghalaya Legislative Assembly elections, 2018. There is a surge of hyper activity in every corner of the state and drama exists everywhere. The people, however, are extremely skeptical if this surge of energy in the months preceding the elections will be transformed into positive actions, or, will it simply wane out in the coming months. But what worries the people most is the fear of the adoption of destructive policies such as corruption, communalism, high-handedness, indiscipline and dictatorial acts by the soon to be elected representatives, in their five year term.